By Jordan Carroll
Alien vs. Predator
It has long been the revered tradition of geeks and fanboys to pit fictional characters against one another. In the past, we have seen Godzilla vs King Kong, Batman vs. Superman, Marvel vs. DC, and Star Trek vs. Star Wars. These battles, however epic, pale in comparison to the war of Ridley Scott’s Alien versus John McTiernan’s Predator. No two extraterrestrials have been so evenly matched, and no such struggle has been so meticulously envisioned. A host of novels and comic books have been written on the subject, but I choose to ignore them. They are outside the Alien and Predator canon, and moreover, they only obscure the issue. I believe it would be nigh impossible for an objective observer to decide the fight between the two. I cannot say who is the strongest or who is the most powerful, but I know in my heart of hearts that Alien deserves to kill Predator.
The fight between Alien and Predator is not simply one alien against the other. We are not discussing two xenobiological monsters; we are talking about two archetypes. Predator, I believe, is the epitome of imperialism. His mission on Earth is not one of necessity. Predator is here for pleasure and ritualistic power. He is a colonist who stoops to play games with the natives at their expense. In many ways, he is a coward. Predator uses high technology to give him an advantage, and because of this, he is a hypocrite. He is the armchair philosopher who puffs cigars as he imagines the plights of a noble savage.
Alien is, first and foremost, a woman. She is striving to get ahead in a patriarchal world. Her killing is done only for her biological and social needs. In a way, she is retribution for crimes against women. For once, the woman is the one inseminating and her partner is the one “carrying” the spawn. She takes the phallic mitre of the dominating male and places it firmly upon her own skull. When she speaks, she speaks with a toothed tongue.
Alien is threatening to Predator, and to civilization, because she represents thorny Nature. Her actions are both vicious and entirely natural. Everything about her is viscerally sexual, making her a Puritan’s nightmare. She is a brutal, undeniable fecundity. Predator, on the other hand, condescends towards nature. He seeks to gain its power by wearing the trappings of the aboriginal. In his arrogance, though, there is a hint of fear. Note that it is only through the most primitive means that Predator is bested. The Predator’s trophies are like gargoyles and cave paintings, warding away the earthly bogies that still haunt the hunter. One can imagine the fear that motivated him to post Alien skulls on his walls.
These themes are demonstrated further in the plots of the movies themselves. Predator centers on rugged American commandos blasting their way through a third world country. It is no small wonder that the fans of Predator are predominantly young males. Alien, however, tells the tale of a working class woman being manipulated by a bureaucratic corporation. We find that only another female, one who understands her, can kill Alien. Predator cannot fathom the workings of the feminine, hiding his vaginal mouth in a mask, so he cannot hope to destroy her.
Alien can and will slay the phallocentric dominators. It was she who killed those decrepit alien giants who once sought to keep her. She cannot be beaten into submission, neither by technology nor by brute strength. The Alien is an unstoppable force, one that cannot be denied.
