By Simon Isham–
Let me give you a piece of advice, kid: don’t start a full-time job or grad school until you’re 21. In the last year, I’ve done both, and it’s terrible. Sometimes, you just need a neat glass of bourbon, but there’s not a drop to drink. Now that I’m finally of age, I get to celebrate the lead-up to my favorite holiday— Halloween —with what I guess is the grown-up version of candy: Netflix and chill(ed bourbon).
And you can too, if you’re legal. Here’s a drinking game for some of my favorite killer shows and movies of now and yesteryear:
American Horror Story — Wednesdays at 10 p.m. on FX.
- Take a shot: Every time The Countess has an outfit change.
- Take a shot: Every time Mrs. Evers has to change the sheets.
- Take a shot: Every time Liz Taylor pours a glass.
- Take a shot: Every time Hypodermic Sally lights one up.
- Take a shot: Every time Lachlan flips his hair out of his eyes.
- Take a shot: Every time Holden plays “The Shining” twins in the hallway.
- Take a shot: Every time a nonwhite person other than Angela Basset appears on screen.
- Finish the bottle: If Jessica Lange makes a cameo.
The Walking Dead — Sundays at 9 p.m. on AMC
- Take a shot: Every time Rick says “Carl,” “stuff,” or “things.”
- Take a shot: Every time Daryl and Carol are alone together.
- Take a shot: Every time a walker is killed with a headshot.
- Take a shot: Every time a nonwhite character has a line.
- Take a shot: Every time someone we just met dies.
- Take a shot: Every time someone calls walkers by a different name.
- Take a shot: Every time Eugene is in a scene.
- Finish the bottle: If Daryl dies. Then riot.
Bates Motel — Netflix
- Take a shot: Every time Norman says “Mother.”
- Take a shot: Every time you see the Bates Motel sign.
- Take a shot: Every time Norma screams “Norman.”
- Take a shot: Every time Dylan has a temper tantrum.
- Finish the bottle: If Norman sleeps with someone. Anyone.
Psycho – Available for rent at Ekstrom Library
- Take a shot: Every time the word “Bates” is said.
- Take a shot: Every time Norman references taxidermy or birds.
- Take two: If you hear Mrs. Bates speak.
- Take a shot: Every time a wide shot of the house on the hill is shown.
- Take a shot: If the classic psycho theme starts playing.
- Take a shot: If a knife is shown.
- Finish the bottle: When you get to the shower scene.
The Shining — Netflix
- Take a shot: When anyone says the name “Torrance.”
- Take two: If that someone is Danny.
- Take a shot: If someone talks about the weather.
- Take a shot: If Jack actually writes something.
- Take a shot: If you see blood.
- Finish the bottle: If you notice that the carpet in the hotel is the same as in Sid’s room in “Toy Story.”
Hocus Pocus – Literally every day on ABC Family
- Take a shot: When the sisters do something in unison.
- Take a shot: Whenever a character uses cheesy ’90s lingo.
- Take two shots: Every time you become annoyed by Dani’s laugh.
- Just keep drinking: Until moments of sexual tension are over.
- Cheers: Every time Winnie points magic out of her fingers.
- Take a shot: Every time Thackery Binx (the cat) gets a little too sassy.
- Finish the bottle: If you catch Max and Dani’s dad make a Dad joke.
Scream: The TV Series — Hulu
Chances are, you didn’t even hear that the Scream franchise — yes, that one — released a TV show on MTV. I’ve been a huge fan of the series, with its witty, self-aware commentary, ever since I saw the first movie, so I was excited to give the show a try. It’s also basically the last project that Wes Craven, who directed Scream and many other horror classics, worked on before he died, so it’s a fitting farewell. You may be wondering: can a horror movie actually work as a TV show? That’s up to the jury. All 10 episodes are already out on Hulu, so you can decide for yourself.
- Take a shot: Every time the ghostface killer appears on screen.
- Take a shot: Every time someone unnecessarily takes off an article of clothing.
- Take a shot: Every time Emma’s phone rings, no matter who’s on the other end.
- Take a shot: Every time someone goes into an abandoned building.
- Take a shot: Every time Jake refers to himself as “The Jake.”
- Finish the bottle: If your favorite character gets killed.