By Jason Kratzwald
Bucks for drains
The prestigious “Bucks for Brains” program began in 1997 by Governor Paul Patton and was aimed to begin building excellence and a national reputation for higher education in Kentucky. This program was financed by over $100-million dollars in funds to the University of Louisville and the University of Kentucky to fund endowments that would attract the best professors and researchers in the country to come to the two major state universities. As much as this public relations mealy may look good on paper, the University of Louisville is drowning, literally. If you have spent a fair amount of time at U of L after a good downpour, you have more than likely experienced the water hazard know as the Belknap Campus thorough-through.
This area stretches from the Unitas Tower to the Natural Sciences Building. No matter the time of year, this area is marked by standing water, dead leaves, and small streams that I promise took the lives of at least four of the 2,000 squirrels on campus. For one, I do not understand why in February there are dead leaves still on the ground at a metropolitan university. From what I know as working as News Editor last year, I was under the impression that tax payers paid for a horticultural staff to keep the campus looking nice. Secondly, if you build a campus that has a gradient slope of 0.2 inches per every 4,000 feet, shouldn’t we find another way to transport standing water away from the heart of the campus to other non-essential thorough-through? I assume that U of L has enough of a pro-active approach to think things out before constructing or landscaping the center of it’s dare to be great epicenter. President John Shumaker must have noticed the lack of drains and standing water during his trek from Grawemeyer Hall to his Mercedes, don’t ya think?
Nevertheless, I am calling University Administration to action. I am calling the challenge, “Bucks for Drains”. My first challenge is directed at private business leaders, state representatives, the PLO, a monkey with a wallet or whomever it may be to donate to my fund to channel stagnant water away from sidewalks and building exits. I think a drain to the sewer would be a great start. My next challenge is directed towards University Administration. We are drowning in rain water and Public Relations mumbo-jumbo concerning this new “research university”. Take this quote from the new Chair of the U of L Board of Trustees, Chester Porter for example.
“We must have a concentration of intellectual capital stewing in a great cauldron of research, generating the new ideas of the future, the entrepreneurship of a dynamic economy, and the innovation that leads to prosperity.”
OK, blah blah blah. All public relations talk for the cameras and press releases from which I stole. I think you forgot one important thing in your comment, and this seems to be a theme that is true for much of U of L’s administration. “What about the students?”
Well for this student, I am getting a little tired of the public relations campaign to make our concrete university look more appealing. We students just want to know if we should buy rubber boots in anticipation for the next downpour. I will start sandbagging, while you keep on the lookout for an Ark, because it is obvious where the University’ priorities lie. All talk, no drain.
Jason Kratzwald is a senior communication major and a columnist for The Cardinal.
jason_kratzwald@louisvillecardinal.com
