By Madeliene Tudor
Here at U of L, there are on-campus students living either in traditional rooms with the classic twin XL beds or in apartment-style dorms.
There are affiliate housing buildings, such as the Brexx and the Province, where kitchens are very much shared spaces. While some students live in historic Old Louisville homes, where the low rent typically means multiple people share a bathroom.
In any of these setups, it’s easy to fixate on the annoyances that include cluttered counters, loud laughter or late-night habits.
I’ve noticed that college students also tend to vent about these issues as a way to cope with stress and bond with each other, so these roommate complaints have definitely become a kind of shared language.
But living with someone is much more than an exercise in tolerance. It’s daily training in compromise, conflict resolution and self-awareness. College is a major step toward adulthood, and these everyday moments are shaping skills that you’ll be relying on long after graduation.
Learning to compromise is essential if you care about your own success. Sharing a room or apartment teaches you to divide responsibilities, respect someone else’s schedule and use communal space fairly.
While you’ve heard about compromise since childhood, living with a roommate is probably the first time you’ve had to put it into daily practice.
Conflict doesn’t have to be catastrophic at all. It’s a normal part of life, and the ability to resolve disagreements respectfully is a skill that many adults still struggle with.
If your roommate’s behavior continuously bothers you, expressing discontent to everyone in your life except them will do nothing. Addressing the issue directly and setting boundaries, with some diplomacy, is how you create a better living situation for yourself.
It’s important to keep in mind that nobody is perfect. Not you, your professors or anyone else you’ll meet here in college. It can be humbling to realize you also have habits that a roommate has to adjust to, which is why living with someone who isn’t in your family will end up building a lot of self-awareness. Try and be as empathetic as possible.
Here are some ways to be a better roommate yourself:
Be honest
It’s never too late in the semester to talk about expectations for cleaning, guests or communal spaces. Most “bad roommate” behaviors aren’t intentional, as they’re just living the way they always have.
Usually, a simple conversation about your needs can make all the difference.
Take responsibility
It should really go without saying that you should pick up after yourself and respect what isn’t yours. Nobody should be stuck playing the “cleaning fairy.”
Treat your roommates the way you’d want to be treated.
Foster a positive relationship
Making the active effort to be friendly with the person you’re living with is definitely a smart move. When there’s some level of rapport and understanding present, people are more likely to be considerate and open to compromise.
Living with a roommate is low-stakes practice for the high-stakes reality of adulthood. Make the most of it and you’ll end up learning more than you expect.
Madeline Tudor is a student in the School of Public Health and Information Sciences and currently works at the Kentucky Department of Public Health in the Division of Lab Services.
Photo by Sara Montoya/The Louisville Cardinal
