By Courtney L. Woods
Derek Zoolander, male model, is a character conceived a few years ago by Ben Stiller for a short film at the VH1 Fashion Awards. The short film was laughable; however, a full-length feature film is a completely different story. What was once laughable is now tiresome, because Derek Zoolander is not exactly a character with a lot of depth.
Stiller, usually known for being the hilarious saving grace of films, is a shadow of his true form as seen in such fare as Meet the Parents. Derek Zoolander, the legendary and daft male model, loses an award and wonders if there is more to life than just being incredibly good-looking. He announces his retirement after a few of his friends are in a “freak gasoline fight accident.”
As his character is revealed, the audience learns that Zoolander has four looks: “blue steel,” “la tigra,” “ferrari” and the mysterious “magnum” that Derek has yet to reveal (unbeknownst to him, all of his looks look the same). He owns the world’s smallest cell phone, can’t read or spell very well, and is not an “ambi-turner.” He can’t turn left.
Somehow, on top of all this goofy storyline, there is a plot to kill the newly elected Prime Minister of Malaysia, as sponsored by the fashion industry. This is where Will Ferrell (Saturday Night Live) comes in as the pooch-carrying, powdered wig wearing designer Jacobim Mugatu, who seeks out to brainwash Derek into committing the crime so that the fashion designers can keep using child laborers to make their expensive (and utterly ridiculous) clothes.
Stiller recruited his father, Jerry Stiller (Seinfeld), as Derek’s agent and his real life wife Christine Taylor (Marcia in The Brady Bunch movies) as model hating journalist Matilda. Yet, the most effective supporting character is Hansel, Derek Zoolander’s competition for male model of the year, as played by Owen Wilson (Meet the Parents). Stiller and Wilson have quite a repor, which serves for some of the film’s only genuine laughs.
The audience is bombarded with familiar famous faces; real life models, designers, actors, and musicians all come out of the woodwork to take part in Zoolander’s hijinx. Two of the most memorable cameos are that of David Bowie and David Duchovny. The latter plays a conspiracy theorist that warns Derek about the brainwashing complete with bad teeth and a pot belly. No matter what Duchovny attempts in his acting career; he still turns up as Fox Mulder (The X-Files) in one incarnation or another.
There are a plethora of cameos, but there is even more product placement. Starbucks cups are hurled at the camera, Tommy Hillfiger ads are plastered everywhere, and even Propecia (the drug for male pattern baldness) gets a plug. This film takes shameless corporate promotion to new levels.
Zoolander, takes a concept that was great as a five minute short film and runs it into the ground. It is tiresome and tries to do what almost every Saturday Night Live film has done, and fails. It has a lot of flash and famous people, but not enough substance or laughs away from the dumb-male-model-bulimia-inducing jokes. Overall, Zoolander, is an okay movie if you have nothing else to do and the fact that it comes out at a time (between summer blockbusters and winter Oscar contenders) when good movies are sparse, gives it a little push. Otherwise it is a loss of brain cells needed for upcoming midterms.
Cardinal Grade: C-
