Bad date stories to make you glad you’re single

By on February 12, 2017
Features

By Sydney Hancock–

Valentine’s Day is the ultimate day of dates. Whether it’s going to a fancy, candle-lit dinner or going to see a romantic flick, most of us have been blessed in the sense of experiencing stellar dates.

Although dates are supposed to fun and picturesque, we often forget they have the potential to go astray. According to a few students’ experiences, dates not only have the potential to be bad but horrifying. If you have plans for this upcoming Valentine’s Day, you’ll want to keep a cautious mind after reading these nightmare date stories.

“For our first Valentine’s day, my boyfriend at the time and I were discussing what we wanted to do for the God-forsaken holiday. I said I’m not a huge Valentine’s Day fan and I hate sappy stuff. Naturally, he got me a necklace with his name engraved on the back of a silver disk, and on the other side, the letters ‘IYQ’ were engraved. I had no idea what it meant. He proudly proclaimed that if you said it out loud, it sounded like ‘I like you.’ He was not joking.”

Just like the following poor souls, sometimes you’re the one to blame for the crash-and-burn date:

-“I ended up slipping into the Ohio River.”

-“I pooped myself and rinsed my underwear out in the bathroom and continued to wear them.”

-“I’m lactose intolerant but I ordered something loaded with dairy at Starbucks on our first date and I ripped the world’s loudest fart … I’m pretty positive the people outside could hear it too.”

On other occasions, however, it’s entirely your date’s fault.

-“My Tinder date got out of the car and started peeing,”

-“On our first date, he introduced me to all of his friends and family as his girlfriend and then proceeded to put cake icing on my nose and suck it off in front of his parents.”

-“My date pooped her pants in my car and got it all over my seats.”

-“After our movie, he left and drove away in the car that we took there together.”

And sometimes, you are completely powerless.

-“On my first Valentine’s Day date, my boyfriend at the time chose to watch Brokeback Mountain, during which he cried. I thought maybe he was just sensitive but at the end of the movie he told me that he thinks he likes boys and left immediately.”

Worst of all, your date just might be straight up creepy.

-“After dinner, he took me to an abandoned YMCA and said, ‘Let’s go looking for hobos.”

-“He wouldn’t say anything during dinner and then after the date I received YouTube links to creepy songs about angels for two weeks.”

-“He rubbed one of my fingers during the entire movie and then we got dinner at CiCi’s pizza where he made me pay for everyone’s food.”

About Sydney Hancock

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