Play Well: Health Promotion answers your sexual health questions

By on February 5, 2015

Sara Choate-


Does penis size matter?

This is a common concern among men who fear their penis is not big enough. It begs the question: what size is ideal? In media and the porn world, all men have above-average sized penises, which can make men in the real world feel pretty insecure about their package. Even though there’s significant pressure on guys to have a huge one, many people find a large penis to be intimidating and scary. The average size of a vagina is three to four inches when it’s not aroused; as a woman gets turned on, it will increase by an inch or so. Therefore, the average consenting vagina can accommodate an average sized penis. Not surprisingly, many women with well-endowed partners report that sexual intercourse is painful.


Let’s step away from the penis, and broaden our focus on the wonderful array of other body parts one can use to stimulate a partner. Using hands, mouth (with a dental dam, of course), toys or other creative objects to excite a partner’s whole body, not just their orifices (a.k.a. holes), can significantly improve the amount of pleasure both people can experience. When we get too wrapped up with size, we lose sight of the bigger pleasure picture. So, no matter what size you are, I encourage you to be creative and curious in your mutually consensual exploration of each other’s bodies.


Why do some women fake orgasm?

Aside from managing their own monthly cycles and wiping from front to back, women in our culture have been given little to no information about the ins and outs of their sexual anatomy. Many women are unaware their clitoris, the bundle of nerve-rich tissue that engorges with blood when stimulated, looks like a wishbone that runs underneath and alongside the labia. Because masturbation is still a taboo subject, many women are unfamiliar with how to stimulate themselves to orgasm.


In media and the porn world, women are always ready for sex, and seem to be enjoying whatever is being done to them; usually some form of penetration. However, in the real world, most women don’t orgasm from penetration alone. In fact, there aren’t that many nerve endings inside of the vagina, except for at the opening. Porn directors choreograph scenes that focus heavily on penetration, and instruct their female actors to moan and writhe with pleasure, even though it’s extremely unlikely they’re coming within spitting distance of an orgasm.


When we put these realizations together, it makes sense some women fake orgasm with their partner. The lack of self-knowledge of their own sexual response cycle and the expectation they should be enjoying themselves, even if their clitoris is only getting the occasional patting upon penetration, results in some women simply going through the motions, quite literally, because they think that’s what’s expected of them.


Editor’s note: The Play Well column in the Jan. 13 issue featured several typos. These mistakes were The Cardinal’s fault and do not reflect on Health Promotion.

About Nick Amon

Nick Amon is the Opinion Editor for The Louisville Cardinal, all views and opinions are of his own. If you have an opinion of your own that you'd like to see in The Cardinal, email him at [email protected]

One Comment

  1. David Kaye

    February 9, 2015 at 4:56 pm

    If penis size wasn’t important people wouldn’t talk about it so much. There is nothing wrong with desiring a large penis or in getting turned on when a person sees one.

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